P.S. Another insectual experience

Date: Tuesday , 4 Dec 2007

I was just thinking to myself the other day how I'm not freaking out as much about insects as I usually have, all my life. This confidence was quickly shattered, when I found the following creature on my wall just above my head as I was getting ready to sleep. Look at this monster, LOOK AT IT:

Knowing that obviously this menace to society intended to crawl into my ear/mouth/nostrils as I slept, I decided to take the situation into my own hands. Unfortunately, I couldn't deliver, as every time I started bringing my shoe closer and closer to it, I'd shudder and get this terrible chill up my spine, and couldn't follow through. I'm talking 6 or 7 failed attempts, quite pathetic of me. So I eyed my enemy some more, taunting me with its eight-leggedness, and settled for the 'if-I-can't-see-it-it's-not-there' tactic. Allow me to paint you a picture. So here I am, at about midnight, standing on my bed, holding a flashlight threateningly, eyes wide open and a red shoe in my right hand, which I used to tap the wall every 5 seconds, making sure that the tap was a good 10-15 cms away from the nasty bug. The purpose of this strategy, which I think displays military genius on my part, was to scare it away into a crack, or through a window, or just somewhere far away from me so that I wouldn't see it. WOW but no, it decided that that place would be an inaccessible corner of the wall. That was it. I took drastic measures. I grabbed my weapon of choice, a lethal bottle of Dove deoderant (thinking in my head "it's insect killer, it's insect killer") and sprayed that spider like there was no tomorrow. Sadly it didn't kill it, but caused it to run (crawl?) very quickly up into a crack in the ceiling, which I was content with. It was very hard to sleep after that. I kept having visions of it falling onto my face in mid-dream, causing me to have a heart attack and die. I chose to sleep face down.